Arsenal vs Bayern Munich, Real Madrid vs Manchester City. Two incredibly enticing Champions League ties, positioned somewhere near the summit of European football.
Most keen followers of the English or European games would have their interest sufficiently piqued. Arsenal are back in the European big time after a lengthy hiatus, Bayern are a full-time banter club this season, Madrid vs City rarely disappoints and probably involves the best two teams on the continent, there’s the Harry Kane narrative, there’s Jude Bellingham. Heck, there’s even Eric Dier.
And yet, if you want to sit down and get emotionally involved in both games as they happen live and watch the full 90-plus minutes… well, you can’t. Because they kick off at the same time.
The football calendar has less breathing room than an asthmatic ant with some heavy shopping but it does feel faintly ludicrous that you can only properly watch four of the eight Champions League quarter-final legs live.
Imagine games clashing over the NFL’s Super Wildcard Weekend? Nope, would never happen now. Or two football World Cup quarter-finals being played at the same time? Ditto the cricket World Cup, or rugby union’s Six Nations. Even the World Darts Championship, for that matter. It’s just basic common sense that knockout-stage matches in a tournament watched by millions are not played at the same time.
Still, The Athletic finds it pretty easy to take in the games at the Emirates and the Bernabeu at the same time because nothing much happens.
Pre-match: Choosing between Arsenal vs Bayern and Real Madrid vs City? That is not easy — it’s like separating your favourite chocolate bars or picking your favourite songs of all time.
Choosing between Michael Owen and Martin Keown on TNT Sports’ coverage? That’s also not easy. Like picking your favourite brand of sinus decongestant.
TNT’s A-list, best, frontline team of pundits and commentators come in for enough stick on a good day, so how will the artists formerly known as BT Sport split up their experts for two big Champions League ties?
Guiding us pitchside at the Emirates, it’s the steady, amiable presence of Laura Woods, with the channel’s primary pundit Rio Ferdinand and, for the Arsenal angle, Keown.
If that was not enough, there is also a secondary team, firstly positioned in the dressing room, of host Jules Breach with Owen Hargreaves and Ally McCoist. The two former players will soon be up in the commentary box alongside Darren “Fletch” Fletcher.
Ferdinand is struggling to fathom how big the two matches are, talking of “career-defining moments, season-defining moments”.
“One for the history books,” Woods adds.
Laura Woods anchored TNT’s coverage at the Emirates (George Wood/Getty Images)
TNT’s purse strings may be tightened as Owen has not been flown to the Bernabeu for a Real Madrid reunion — he is in a studio with the channel’s regular Manchester City representative Joleon Lescott (no need to mention that he played more matches for Wolverhampton Wanderers and Everton) and host Reshmin Chowdhury.
Our first visit here is for the big City team news — there is no Kevin De Bruyne in the XI and Mateo Kovacic is in. How does that change the setup of the side, Breach asks Lescott.
“I think it could change the person on the pitch,” he replies.
Elsewhere, Steve McManaman has made it to Madrid to co-commentate alongside Adam Summerton and, for now, he is pitchside with another host, Becky Ives.
The coverage has been on one channel to begin with but splits at 7.15pm, with Arsenal on TNT Sports 1 and City on 2.
“Arsenal don’t have a weakness,” Hargreaves boldly declares.
There are interviews with Gabriel Jesus, Leroy Sane and Mikel Arteta, plus lots of chat about Kane, while in the City build-up, they have Carlo Ancelotti and a segment on Bellingham.
Some tactical insight would be nice, or a bit of Bayern’s weird, deficiency-packed season, but, in general, the coverage is all quite nice and solid and watchable, other than a tendency to try to express how big the matches are. We get it, we are already watching.
“It’s so exciting,” says Owen. “It’s so exciting,” echoes Chowdhury.
It is so exciting.
8:03pm: “We’ve got to tell you about this… there’s already been a goal in the Bernabeu.”
The Athletic’s foolproof plan to watch Arsenal on the telly and City on a laptop has been foiled by some dodgy north London internet after just two minutes. Laptop down. Time to channel hop.
TNT go split screen on the Arsenal game to show Bernardo Silva’s early opener.
“Just for the record, I’ve only seen it the once, but I ain’t having the goalkeeper,” McCoist says.
8:14pm: Bukayo Saka takes Ben White’s pass and puts Arsenal in front with a stunning finish. The camera pans to the Arsenal fans, then to Kane to see how forlorn he looks and then to the celebrating Arsenal players.
Saka celebrates his opening goal (Ian Kington/AFP via Getty Images)
It’s a great atmosphere at the Emirates and is shaping up to be a hell of a contest. We’ll stick with this for now.
But then “Fletch” drops the bombshell that there’s not one, but two goals to tell us about in Madrid. Time to switch to the other side to see how City are reacting to falling behind. It sounds like a humdinger in Madrid.
8:20pm: Internet still dodgy, laptop stream still down, channel hopping still annoying. Let’s check back in on Arsenal… Oh, missed another goal. Hargreaves, who began the night in the dressing room, then went pitchside and is now in the commentary box (if only he’d shown this much versatility in his playing days, etc) is talking about David Raya being a bit unlucky.
With no option to rewind, it’s over to the City channel to hope they replay the goal from the Arsenal game. Sigh.
8:22pm: OK, here is the replay. Not sure Raya has been unlucky, to be honest, that’s just a bit shambolic all around from Europe’s so-called best defence.
“What a night of entertainment we’re having,” Summerton exclaims. With five goals scored already, he’s not wrong, although The Athletic has somehow only seen one of them in real-time.
8:30pm: Finally, the right channel at the right time… Sane is on a Diego Maradona run, past one, two, three, four. Saliba slides in… pen.
Hargreaves is raving about Manuel Neuer’s dainty skill in the build-up.
“Awwwhhh,” noises McCoist.
The silence after Kane dispatches the penalty — Bayern fans’ naughtiness earlier in the competition means they were not given tickets for the Emirates — is very weird.
Six goals in 32 minutes. Wait a tick, the internet is working again, split screen a-go-go just in time for some deep McManaman analysis on City blowing their lead: “Two deflections for the two goals, it’s just the way it is.” Nice one.
Harry Kane levels from the penalty spot (Ian Kington/AFP via Getty Images)
8:46pm: Half-time. Ferdinand is raving about the Bayern movement for Serge Gnabry’s equaliser: “The weight of the pass from (Leon) Goretzka running at full pace cannot be underestimated.”
TNT, like Sky Sports, has a horrible habit of going into one-eyed Fan TV mode, but Keown is pleasantly critical of Arsenal’s defending, echoing Ferdinand’s judgement that Arsenal have been naive in letting Sane run 60 yards into the box.
Jakub Kiwior and Raya are to blame, Keown says, calling the former “shaky” and the latter “panicky and a bit rushed, even for the penalty”.
On Kane’s lackadaisical spot kick, Ferdinand adds, tongue in cheek: “That’s an under-9s penalty… out of order, really, at the Emirates.” Honestly? I don’t mind this at all. Plus points for Ri/Rio humour.
It’s a bit more low-key in the nondescript London (presumably) studio as Lescott and Owen react to City’s defensive shortcomings.
Real Madrid’s two goals have “put a whole new complex on this tie”, Owen claims, seemingly advocating another tier being built on the Bernabeu.
Chowdhury is enticing us to stay put: “Captivating, fast and furious… impossible to predict. Toing and froing, topsy turvy; you wonder what the second half will hold.”
Meanwhile, from Woods: “You’re not going to miss a goal across both ties.” She’s got some nerve.
9:12pm: Kane is booked after clashing with Gabriel, but the replays look pretty horrendous. Will the domestic commentators go easy on England’s skipper?
Harry Kane was lucky to only be booked for an apparent elbow on Gabriel (TNT Sports)
McCoist: “Little bit naughty that, Harry. He has a wee look (at Gabriel) initially. I’m not convinced he tries to elbow him, but he’s certainly putting his elbow into an area he knows the defender is coming on to.”
How to call a deliberate elbow non-deliberate. Nice.
No one wants a commentator’s opinion, but this being 2024, “Fletch” will illuminate us.
“His elbow collides with the chin and neck of Gabriel,” he says. Yep, like when you get a collision between a bullet and a chest.
GO DEEPER
Humble and hungry Bayern Munich show the energy they need to restore their dominance
9:20pm: With Bayern frustrating Arsenal with subs and stoppages, Real Madrid vs City is eminently the more watchable game. In fact, it’s end to end, with Bellingham, Vinicius Junior, Jack Grealish and Phil Foden all going close.
9:26pm: City’s enterprise and adventure are rewarded with an equaliser. Foden, one touch, bang. Phenomenal accuracy. For some reason, the coverage immediately cuts to a solitary, emotionless man in the home end taking a picture on his phone.
9:33pm: Two goals in two minutes for the English sides. Josko Gvardiol with an unlikely stunner at the Bernabeu (not that The Athletic sees it — the stream buffers and when it returns, the replays have come and gone), and then Leandro Trossard levels things up for Arsenal.
“Holy smokes!” enthuses McCoist. “That’s all about Jesus — dear me, the wee man’s feet! It’s unbelievable.”
Two classic matches have unfolded, but attempting to watch both at the same time drains pretty much all emotion from the viewing experience. It is entertaining, sure, but essentially a goal service where you can instantly watch the main highlights as they happen. Tactical analysis, though, or emotional heft? Forget it.
Of course, this is nothing new, but is there a solution? Could the Champions League quarters be spread out over Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday and relevant domestic fixtures moved accordingly — i.e. to previous Fridays and following Sundays? Or is that asking for too much cooperation?
Could the kick-off times be split to, say, 7pm and 9pm to avoid overlaps? Or is that too problematic for people to attend straight after work, or would get home post-11pm? No easy answers, but it is still a peculiar conundrum which should be solved, especially for a competition increasingly designed with a global TV audience in mind.
9:39pm: And it’s 3-3 at the Bernabeu. Federico Valverde, what a strike. The stream buffers again.
Valverde (right) celebrates his equaliser (Clive Brunskill/Getty Images)
At the Emirates, it’s Bayern on the attack… but here come Real Madrid again and Bellingham almost pokes in a fourth before John Stones denies him. This is split-screen, goggle-eyed madness.
9:52pm: Oh, and the boos are loud, so loud. Saka was surely taken out for a penalty… but no.
McCoist calls it: “The wee fella throws his foot in. D’ya know something, the referee might just have got that one correct.”
Arteta walks onto the pitch with lips pursed like he has a cold sore to hide. The Arsenal game may have finished, but you cannot stop watching it yet.
“The wee fella is having a go at the referee,” McCoist says, seemingly having rechristened Saka on the basis of his height.
Hargreaves believes 35-year-old referee Glenn Nyberg has produced “remarkable” refereeing for his age.
In the studio, they do not quite agree.
“How has that not been given?” Ferdinand fumes. “I’m walking around in disbelief with my arms on top of my hands on top of my head.”
Quite an image.
Over in Madrid, it’s all more cordial, with opposition players embracing and smiling. They’re old hands at this.
GO DEEPER
Manchester City lost control against Real Madrid but battled back like champions
And there we have it. Two games, two channels, 10 goals. Enjoyable? On a surface level, yes, but a strange and unsatisfactory way to take in two thrillers. It’s the same again tonight… and next week. Make your choice.
Meanwhile, TNT are previewing their coverage for Thursday night, proudly proclaiming that Atalanta vs Liverpool, Bayer Leverkusen vs West Ham and Aston Villa vs Lille will all be screened live at 8pm. Wonderful.
Anyone got a spare TV?
(Top photos: Getty Images)
Gregory Daniels is your guide to the latest trends, viral sensations, and internet phenomena. With a finger on the pulse of digital culture, he explores what’s trending across social media and pop culture. Gregory enjoys staying ahead of the curve and sharing emerging trends with his readers.
